Tuesday, May 22, 2007

Novocaine For The Soul

Last night, for whatever reason, my dream chauffeur decided it was time to take a spin back to the bowling alley where I worked in the 70's. I knew I didn't belong there - somehow I let myself in after closing and was hanging out in the back where I used to work. My job title was "pinchaser," which meant I reset the machines when they went off cycle, set up pins for the bowlers if there was some sort of discrepancy, and do whatever else the manager decided needed to be done. Like the the time I had to shovel out 6 feet of years-old urine-soaked beer bottles and cans, pizza-boxes, candy wrappers, condoms, undergarments etc. from the outdoor emergency exit stairwell that had been used as a combination free dumpster and public toilet by the local kids and winos.

It was loud back there - no ear protection or nothing. I was like 2 feet away from Alley # 1, and when bowlers were on 1 & 2 my ears would ring like an A440 sine wave at 80 db's into the next week. Not only that, they had me clean pins by hand using Trichloroethylene in this little machine that splashed the poison all over the place and had a short in it which resulted in periodic electric shocks.

Goddamn Republicans!

It wasn't the 70's anymore - that much I knew. I had my noise-cancellation headphones in tow, but since the lanes were closed no one was bowling.

I clicked on my Zen Sleek Photo, and it played "Novocaine for The Soul" by The Eels in its entirety.

Better that than "Take The Money and Run..."

Novocaine for The Soul
by Edge/Goldenberg

Life is hard
And so am I
You'd better give me something
So I don't die
Novocaine for the soul
Before I sputter out
Before I sputter out

Life is white
And I am black
Jesus and his lawyer
Are coming back
Oh my darling
Will you be here
Before I sputter out
Before I sputter out
Before I sputter out

Guess who's living here with the great undead
This paint by numbers life is fucking with my head, once again

Life is good
And I feel great
Cuz mother says I was
A great mistake
Novocaine for the soul
You'd better give me something to fill the hole
Before I sputter out
Before I sputter out
Before I sputter out
Before I sputter out


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