Respectable Street

The thing that really infuriates me about the Conservative Republicans with which I’ve had the misfortune of being spoken to condescendingly under the guise of political discussion is their sanctimonious claims of moral superiority. Their pedantic tone and righteous indignation (with an accusatory undercurrent that implies guilt among any who dare disagree!) leveled at the real and imagined infractions by members of the Democratic party coupled with the insistence that members of the Republican party are pure of heart, possessing a deep respect for Christian values and immune to any sort of political hanky-panky. Finding myself in the midst of such a discussion I’m always at odds with two possible explanations: "This person is either a really good liar or he is as dumb as jar of Hellmann’s Real Mayonnaise." I end up saying things like, “Issues of character and values have little meaning to me in American politics, and Republicans are no less corrupt than the Democrats.” Doesn’t matter. They continue down the same path, certain that they are right.

In light of the bubbling DeLay / Abramoff / Scanlon scandal, I’m now ready to concede that the two parties are not equally corrupt. Indeed, if you were the type of person who would like to abuse political power for your own personal gain, you’d have to be an idiot to join the Democratic Party. How much did they say the Clinton’s profited from the Whitewater land deal? $70,000?

Sadly, there will be no epiphany on their part. No phone calls or e-mails from old friends and acquaintances telling us that we were right, admitting to their own stupidity or greed. They will find some excuse, some way to blame someone else, but it doesn’t matter. At least we will be rid of that evil selfish bastard DeLay. You know, the guy that claimed he wanted America to abide by Biblical Law…

Respectable Street
By Andy Partridge
From XTC’s “Black Sea”

It's in the order of their hedgerows
it's in the way their curtains open and close
it's in the look they give you down their nose
all part of decency's jigsaw I suppose

Heard the neighbour slam his car door
don't he realise this is respectable street
What d'you think he bought that car for
'cos he realise this is respectable street

Now they talk about abortion
in cosmopolitan proportions to their daughters
as they speak of contraception
And immaculate receptions on their portable
Sony entertainment centres.

Now she speaks about diseases
and which sex position pleases best her old man
Avon lady fills the creases
when she manages to squeeze in past the caravans
that never move from their front gardens.

It's in the order of their hedgerows
it's in the way their curtains open and close
it's in the look they give you down their nose
all part of decency's jigsaw I suppose

[I LOVE this bit!]

Sunday church and they look fetching
Saturday night saw him retching over our fence
bang the wall for me to turn down
I can see them with their stern frown
as they dispense the kind of look that says
they're perfect.

© 1980 Virgin Music (Publishers) Ltd.